DLF IPL 3.0 - Nightmare Team

When everybody is busy thinking about the IPL 3.0 Dream Team , we thought the other way and with great difficulty made a IPL 3.0 Nightmare Team. This team consists of the high profile flops of this edition of IPL. JUST THIS EDITION OF IPL! So here's the FORGETTABLE XI (4 overseas players only). This elite group of players have given nightmares to their franchisee owners, team sponsors and worst of all cricket lovers. So, sooner they are forgotten the better and they must hope this doesn't affect their value in the next player auctions.

Openers Haydos and Gilly make it to the team by default. The famous Aussie opening jodi back together like the good ol' days only not good anymore. The mongoose man showed the power of mongoose just for a match and that's it, his Mongoose died. On the other hand Gilli's koobaburra dint fly high. They played every match and failed in most of them. Next comes in Tillakaratne-Dilscoop-Dilshan. He was one of the T20 sensations, but failed to dominate this time. At no.4, its none other than our very own MRF Blimp a la UV Singh. Stripped off captaincy, no hugs from preity, etc etc.. can really demotivate any player and UV wasn't an exception. Don't worry UV, you are the captain of our side. *Cheers* Next is UV's best friend Md.Kaif. Though he dint get many chances, he would have screwed it anyways. Next is Johnny Bravo oops Dwayne Bravo. MI put in more faith in him than KiPo but he failed to grab the opportunity. His batting and bowling sucked equally. Next comes the ICL sensation, Chennai Superstars Captain, Rajagopal Sathish. Had chances to prove himself with the bat and ball, failed to capitalize. Only consolation was his fielding. Next is Lakshmipathy-C'mon Hit Me-Balaji. A pretty consistent bolwer who bowls full-toss & short wide outside off-stump at 110ks. Next is the deadly duo Ishant Sharma and R.(i).P Singh. Lesser said the better. The last player, no prizes for guessing, its Shanthakumaran Sreesanth and you all know why. This list could never be complete without him.

So here's a quick look at the team once again.

• Matthew Hayden
• Adam Gilchrist(wk)
• Tillakaratne Dilshan
• Yuvraj Singh©
• Md.Kaif
• Dwayne Bravo
• Rajagopal Sathish
• Lakshmipathy Balaji
• Ishant Sharma
• Rudra Pratap Singh
• Shantakumaran Sreesanth

To hell with this team :)

DLF IPL - Wahs at War

Wah are at War and it aint smelling like blueberry pies. Sooper Kings take on the Double D's today in a crucial encounter. The loser is not necessarily out and the winner not surely through as we said here. But surely both teams are desperate to win and will be happy with points in the bag rather than prayers on their lips. So it is simple, go out there and win 2 games and the next 2 and be crowned champs. CSK hv a neat record against DD, now going 3-2 head to head. So, that will mentally get them ready for the challenge. For DD Viru has been at ease against CSK and Chepauk is his one of his favorites undoubtedly. So, this is what the two teams must look to do.

CSK- It should be an easy outing for the Super Kings considering their current form. Finally after several FAILED experiments, the bowling department seems to have clicked. Though not attacking , but definetely better. Batting has always been their strength. Its good to see that the batting is not dependant on Haydos. Its good to see the young Indian guns firing. Murali-I can Fkn hit DLF Max too- Vijay has been a revelation. Suresh -IPL- Raina has been the backbone of the team in all the 3 editions. MSD, you never know, when he hits, it stays hit! If one of them clicks,its PARTY TIME for CSK! Last time when these two teams met, it was a run feast at the Feroz Shah Kotla. We all got to know the reason for the MEGA HYPE for Mongoose. Double Ds scored 185, thanks to Joginder-Golden Arm- Sharma. Haydos and his pet, Mongoose murdered the DD bowlers. The problem which CSK faced in the first half is now faced by DD. Their bowling looks weak after the exit of Nannes. It still seems an area of concern. Of late, their batting seems to be breaking too. Looks like they have their IPODs on when batting, they just dont listen to their partner's call. I hope they continue this way for CSK to make full use of it. Playing in Chennai doesn't really matter to any team because they cheer for everyone, even you and me. Its more like a neutral venue. I feel CSK should stick with the same winning combo. 3 spinners and 2 pacers looks perfect . Their main strategy is to remove the openers as quickly as possible. Gambhir has looked dangerous, but he will run himself out, no worries there. Nothing much to say about the rest of the batting, maybe Karthik will try to impress the crowd. CSK should bat first, it should be a belter of a pitch, score an assload of runs. Bowlers should make sure that Viru and Warner get back to the pavillion within the powerplay and the Double D's will succumb to the pressure automatically.

DareDevils - The Double D's are in woeful form and they know it. They haven't settled into a stable team combination and the absence of Dirty Dirk is proving crucial. Play to win, has to be the plan here. Probably bringing back Dilshan into the xi will help. He has been kept away for too long one feels. McDonald was given the treatment so we hope capt.GG learnt not to bowl his happy meals, in the last few overs like Raina did earlier captaining CSK. Viru has to get going and not towards the dug-out. DK just cannot bat at no.4 that is just insane! Probably go in with Warner, Dilshan, Collingwood and Vettori will make sense and bringing in Bhatia will provide some depth. Also if Viru can bowl a couple will surely help the cause as the wicket in Chennai is sure to assist the slower bowlers. Last time around Haydos unleashed the Goose. That shouldn't happen again, getting wickets early exposes the likes of Badri, Morkel and that should help DD buckle them and strangle them. It would be a good toss to lose. But, an important game to win.

DLF IPL CSK-Chennai Super Krap

Well, for people who believe they witnessed one of the best matches ever, I pity them. It was one of the worst matches I have ever seen. And only teaches how teams should not screw up a chase. First of all, it was a contest between a team with a poor batting and a team with a poor bowling. CSK seemed to have an upper hand as they had the momentum with them after 2 consecutive victories. Raina won the toss and elected to field, quite a good decision considering the dew factor and also the fact that KXI were playing 2 spinners.

It was quite a surprise to see Irfy opening alongside Bopara. CSK suddenly, from no where got brains and dropped Joginder Sharma. KXI kept losing wickets at regular intervals. Yuvi and Irfy showed some resistance. CSK's bowling was pretty ordinary . KXI batting was even worse. Wonder what was going through their minds.Everyone got out with poor stroke play and lack of application. If I was Md. Kaif's father/mother/wife/child I would lock him up in the dungeon for eternity. The guy should not be allwoed to hold a cricket bat ever again! It was a terrible batting display by Punjab and they managed to score 136. Moorali getting the better of his two countrymen (Sanga & Jaya) BRILLIANT!

Then the Mongoose Man and Mini bullet took strike for CSK. They were scoring briskly at a steady pace and KXI , by the looks, were all down with drooping shoulders thinking that the match was slipping away from them. But with the fall of Haydos everything seemed to slip out of CSK's grasp. First a horror run-out of the capt. Raina and then the crumble. Vijay, Badri have hardly impressed and it seems with Srikanth their chances of wearing the national cap will also disappear. Kemp injured himself with a side-strain so, he could not come in to bat as well. With Parthiv out after making his half-ton Gony made it to the crease. With just a run-a-ball reqd. all that was needed was sensible batting, pushin the ball into the gaps and giving Morkel most of the strike. But, it was not to be. Gony wanted to become Super Gony in no time and ended losing his stumps and CSK reqd 10 off the last over. Albie hit a boundary the very 1st delivery to make it 5 from 5 and then 3 from 3. Here the final twist. Ashwin hits the ball and they run 2!!! Why would you want a bowler to face the final 2 balls of a match Albie. Even if it was 2 off 2 with Albie on strike it would be the smarter choice. Alas, Irfy bowled a dot ball and Ashwin hit the final ball straight to Kaif. Match tie = SOOOPER OVER

KXI chose the rookie Juan Rusty Theron, who bowled a superb spell earlier in the game. Not looking rusty at all. so the CSK managed 1,W,2,6,W just 9!! So 10 to win for the Zintans and they got there with a slight hiccup but, when you have the quality of Yuvi, and the two Lankans in your side you are more likely to win from these situations. Had MSD been there it would have been a sight! Well played to both teams to make an interesting match out of shitty batting performances. Lalit Modi will be very pleased!

DLF IPL 3.0 Dudes to Duds

The IPL is everywhere... everywhere you go, everywhere you see, and mostly everywhere you don't want it to be. Among all this hara-kiri some expected IPL heroes have disappointed. This post is dedicated to them, thanks to restore sanity and help us waste time just hoping today you will fire.

K xi P - yea, the entire team has been a tad disappointing. I'm sure the boys know it themselves.

Haydos - the Mongoose man is yet top breathe fire like he did in the previous IPL's. (this post was drafted way before Hayden tore apart the Daredevil attack and left them crying like babies. I take credit for his knock.)

Dilfan - Considering Delhi's majestic line-up. It is hard to expect a knock from each of the top5. But 0,0,17 (15 against CSK) is just hard to digest.

Yuvi - The last time he hit it was 2009!

Che Pujara - First lack of opportunity, now lack of patience from KKR.

Poppadom Smith - Yet another finger injury, end of the road for him.

Jayasurya - If he's in the team for his bowling then pardon me but, his bat has not done the tonking it promises.

AB DeVil - Was found under-par when DD needed him the most.

Sangakkara - Has not been comfortable, lacked imagination couldn't defend 200+ score! ahem..

Freefanth (Aapam choo..) - I duno why anyone has expectations from him.

Sloon Tait - Fast & Furious, all over the place.

Dada - Captaincy may have been inspiring. Still a lot left to cheer, a long way to go.


The tournament is alive, still a lot to play for. It is difficult to judge too soon. It may be too harsh on a few, DC haven't played too much so many DC players get away. Rajasthan Royals look to be getting into deeper mess with Smith, Dimi being ruled out. Martyn not performing, Lumb flopped as well. Captain Warney now is bit to follow on twitter.

IPL 3.0 Sooper Dooper Kings

Chennai Super Kings

Alas the Chennai Sooper Kings, the side that lost the championship in the inaugural season and then lost in the knock-out semis in the second season, look like they are on the downslide. They rely heavily on Aussie giant Matt Haydos and from there the problems begin. MSD has played Parthiv-mini-Patel as he is free from the wk duty that has already given him enough back issues. But this means Parthiv who can(read should) be playing lower down the order opens the batting with Hayden. If MSD is going to take IPL seriously, as equal to winning World Cup. Then he may have to strain his back a bit more and stand behind stumps and accommodate an extra bowler in place of mini Parthiv. Otherwise Parthiv has to lift his game, or bat lower down the order so, Vijay can open the batting. The CSK are marred and scarred by injuries to Jake' Oram, Al' Morkel has his line of fitness issues, Mike Huss wont be available initially. Losing Flintoff was a big blow for them. But, the replacements for Freddie and Stephen Fleming were just not enough. So now they have Justin Kemp their new recruit along with a few Lankans whom they dont miss to buy at every player auction.

CSK do look like a formidable opposition but, seriously not the top-3 in the competition. In Balaji and Gony their bowling can fall apart anytime. Add Tyagi to that, MSD will have some serious cardiac issues while fielding. Raina, Badri, Vijay should help MSD post big, bigger, biggest totals everytime so, he wont worry about the bowling too much. Ashwin, Jakati & Murali give him added tension of whom to drop and whom to play. It will take a few games initially to find the balance in the team and sort out fitness issues.

SQUAD:R Ashwin, L Balaji, C Ganapathy, MS Gony, SB Jakati, M Muralidaran, M Ntini, S Tyagi, KB Arun Karthik, S Badrinath, GJ Bailey, ML Hayden, MEK Hussey, SK Raina, M Vijay, T Thushara, JA Morkel, JDP Oram, NLTC Perera, JM Kemp, MS Dhoni, PA Patel.

STRENGTH:Hayden opening, Depth in batting.

WEAKNESS:Bowling in death overs.

WATCH OUT FOR:Lankans could well prove to be strong plus for CSK, Ganapathy, Bailey. Justin Kemp.

WAH'S XI:

• Haydos
• Patel*
• Raina
• MSD©
• Albie
• Badri/Vijay
• Perera/Thushara
• Ganapathy
• Murali
• Balaji
• Jakati

WAH SAY: Bailey replacing Pup in the Kiwi tour mid-way will hurt CSK. Mike Huss will have to play in a cramped batting order again. I will have to stick my neck out and say CSK are most likely to miss the bus to the semis. DD, MI, RCB clear favorites right now. With KxiP, DC, CSK fighting for that final semi spot. But, dont count them out completely! Like MSD would say it "MIND IT!" Period.